“We all think that we choose our own paths and make our own destinies. But the truth is, we all are chosen for a cause. We all are chosen for a purpose. And the path we walk isn’t something we chose. But the path was laid in front of us. So we aren’t tools of own choosing. But weapons of fate that was bestowed upon us.”
I really love these blogs. And whenever I write these, I think I am the only one having a voice to do so. But the truth is, there are more than 3 billion people out there who are on their computer at this very same moment, expressing how they feel. Whether it is writing about their recent break-up or about their dream job, everyone is venting out and waiting for the world to hear them. That is why I believe writing these blogs have been very therapeutic for me. Yes, I do know that I don’t write these blogs on a weekly basis now and neither do I send them to everyone on my mailing list anymore. Well, it is because times have changed and I am not the same guy I was three years ago. I think I have become more calmer and simpler. I am getting white hair now. And I sometimes I do think that I have become a Dinosaur. Old and very soon extinct. Long gone are the days when I thought I was a stud and a lady killer. I now remember those thoughts and just laugh at myself. I take those acts as acts of foolishness. Women don’t flirt with me anymore. Men don’t wanna be my friends and I no longer wanna be a part of that circle. I am more by myself nowadays and the things that mattered to me and affected me don’t anymore. I am not lonely anymore but I am Alone. Lonely is a negative word but being Alone is a feeling of contentment. My dependability factor over people has completely stopped. Like I have an invisible wall all around me which is protecting me from the harsh facts of my reality. And in the midst of these strong and mature changes comes Mma. I always told you that I would one day write an entire blog on Mma. I didn’t know it would be so soon. The reasons I chose to call this Blog entry M.A.M.M.A. is because even thought this is entry is my view on Mixed Martial Arts, it is also a way to tell you all that Mma for me is not only a sport but also a blanket of protection from the reality I am running away from. Just like a mother who protects her child from the cold wrapping him up in her arms, Mma is like a Mother for me also. Protecting me, nurturing me and taking care of me, when I need it the most …
"To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting."
I have always been a sports guy. Whether it was dogdeball or relays in junior school or basketball and cricket while I was growing up, me and sports were always connected. Yes, I know I was the fat kid in school but that never stopped me from playing sports. Until the Match-Fixing bullshit, I was a devotee of Cricket. But since then, I haven’t looked at that sport the same way again. So through all the trials and errors and trying this and trying that, I finally came to a place in my life where I wanted more. The universe answered my prayers and then gifted me the joy of Mixed Martial Arts. At first I was looking to do some Boxing ‘cause I thought I needed to push my stamina and endurance to the next level. But when I tasted to sweet juice of Mma, I knew my life would never be the same again. That was that day and now, three years later, I am deeply rooted in the Mma pool. Back then I didn’t know the Ufc players or any the brands or the sponsors but since Chris Weidman, the current middleweight champion of the world knocked the living day lights out of Anderson Silva, I am up to date with everything. And thanks to Sony Six, I get to see the all the Ufc Fight Nights and Pay Per Views live as they happen. Being a sports fan, I can’t even begin to tell you how excited I feel when I see those matches live! And thanks to twitter and instagram, I now have many people who I can call my Social Mma Friends. I interact with them on a daily basis and it brings a joy to my face when exclusive Mma Gyms accounts on instagram reply to me and when Mma Quotes on twitter favourite my tweet and make me feel so special. You see, Mma is not only a sport for me. It has now become a way of life for me. And to be honest without Mma’s safety net on me, I don’t think I would had been this strong
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
You ask me, why Mma in a country where 95% of the population are glued to their televisions for cricket. Well, it is because Mma not only is good for my fitness and cardio and flexibility, it is also a way for me to vent out my anger. It is a vent for me to let go of all of that hidden aggression that I have. I have always stated that I am a monster. And monsters always need something to fight for. For creatures like us, calmness is not an option. We feel more comfortable in pain that running away from it. And getting our asses kicked in every Mma session really pleases us. I really wanna thank Somesh Kamra from Mma India for introducing me to this sport. It is all because of him that I came to know what Mma truly is. And now, thanks to Ufc, Youtube and Xff, I get to train Mma everyday. I really wish and dream to see even India opening up it’s arms to Mma and giving people like us the pleasure to see those fights live on our soil. Even though that maybe just a joke for everyone right now, for me it is a hope I cling on too. I love Mma so much that now, even my wardrobe is filled with tees from Mma Warehouse. Believe it or not but everyday I make it a point to go to the website and see the latest arrivals of Mma Apparel. And between you and me, I have also decided that in the future, me wearing my Mma Tees will be my own style statement. For the ordinary it will only be a t-shirt but for the ones who are a part of the grind will know what those Tees mean. I read a Mma quote a while back which stated that, “Men have always been barbaric. We, in our true forms are fighters and warriors and whoever doesn’t accept that, is a coward.” I completely agree with that because until I crossed paths with Mma, I, myself was a coward.
"Martial arts is not about fighting; it's about building character."
Mma is not only a sport for me. It is also my protection shield from my own reality. Mma makes me forgot everything else and makes me live an alternative reality. People on twitter ask me questions about my life and some of them even send me hate tweets but little do they know how difficult it is to face the harsh truths of reality everyday. Before I WANTED the world to know my pain and I wanted everyone to lend me a helping hand. But now, since Mma has consumed me, I don’t need their sympathy or pity. I am busy in my own created alternative reality where I know I can’t be harmed. Whenever the fears of reality find a way to hurt me, I quickly close my eyes and enter my own ‘Mma World’ where I am not Mahaakshay Chakraborty anymore. And that really helps me. It is like my own imaginary pill which I take to make the demons go away. I don’t say One, Two, Three in my head. I say M M A and within seconds I am teleported to the gyms in america where I am just another regular joe who has come to train and where I am sparring of against my comrades who bleed Mma too. The universe has always given me signs and signals and I always have noticed them too. Believe it or not, just before I started writing this blog, I was surfing through my favourite tv channels and I saw that Ufc Fight Night was coming on Sony Six. I really do take this as a sign from the universe telling me to follow my bliss. Yes, Mma is bliss for me. It is joy and happiness all wrapped up in one long hard hour of training. Al though it is very difficult to find places in mumbai where Mma actually takes place, I somehow find a way to train. For example the gym in Malad has a Mma class. But the trainer over there sucks ass. He doesn’t know squat of Mma and he acts as if he knows it all. So now, me and my buddy henna, go and train by ourselves before that prick shows up and leave as soon as he arrives. When there is a will, there is a way and I know that until my time comes to shine on the big screen, Mma will always be my way to my happiness and joy and bliss. :-)
"Never stop. Never stop fighting. Never stop dreaming."
I am very happy I wrote this blog on Mma. Through this blog, I have also said things which I knew I wouldn’t otherwise. I wanted to pass a message. Not only to the people but also to the universe and to fate and destiny. I want to say that I am stronger than I was when you first met me. I don’t want anymore emotional support. I am not dependant on anyone anymore. I have been blessed with the sport known as Mma and every time I put my straps on I am reminded of the hardships that I have faced and how strong I have been to overcome them. My brother Bhushan often tells me a lovely line to lift me up. He says, “One More Round Bhai. One More Round.” And I remember those lines every time I fall. I remember that fighting is what I do best and even though the future may not be the way I have planned it to be and even though that scares the crap out of me, I know I will always have Mma with me. I know I will always have those punching bags and knee pads and the blood and the sweat and tears waiting to greet me with open arms and embrace and protect me from what it is I am not willing to accept. I thank everyone and all those brave warriors who give up amazing fights for our entertainment. I thank the universe for showing me a way out and a vent to let out steam. I thank all the people who love Mma as much as I do. And I thank Mma for saving me ‘cause I know I need saving. I know I need a shelter. And I know I need a M .a .m .m .a like Mma to save me from the nightmares and demons that I face everyday. I know I will fall again. But I also know that I will rise again too. The Whip with which Fate tears my skin off is winning. It has managed to tear and break me down and I am now crawling towards to the end destination of my dreams. But Fate hasn’t broken my will. And I know one day Fate will be tired of lashing me. It will quit Punishing me and it will finally give me what I want. Today, I can say that it might not be what I dreamed off but whatever it is Fate and Destiny and the Universe plan to give me, I know I will be Deserving of it.
"I'm not a fighter, but in my mind I'm fighting every day. 'What's new? What am I doing?' I'm fighting myself. My soul is samurai. My roots aren't samurai, but my soul is."
This is Me and This Is My Story With A Touch Of Mixed Martial Arts …
With All My Might,
Your No.1 Fan,